His Suicide
by Jenni0889
Summary: Yusuke is depressed and no one knows why. Kaiko and Kuwabara finally go to Kurama for help, but can Kurama help? Yuske is missing and they all go look, but is it too late? Someone will die!
1. Chapter 1

started when I was depresssed, but someone will die, I promise that

* * *

"There are times when it seems as if any and all positive feelings in the world have been sucked away, grinded, and stuck in a gar which would be locked away in a twenty two thousand pound safe. Life can be cruel; everyone knows that." she told him. 

"But what happens when life becomes too cruel," he asked, truly wondering, in a monotone voice. He had no feeling in his speech what so ever.

He used to walk everyday, now he refuses to take a single step. He used to say things... sometimes not so nice things… but now he says barely nothing at all. He used to eat and enjoy eating, now he has no taste for food. He used to be strong, he used to be there, and you used to know that he was there. Now he is weak, and never there; not even for himself.

He never used to like getting up in the morning, but now he doesn't even get up… ever. When his friends used to come over, he used to talk to them, fight with them… sometimes in not so nice ways… but at least he used to do something… Now he just stares off into space… all the time.

Yusuke sat on his bed, in his room, as he had been doing for the past couple of weeks. "You're like a zombie…" said Kaiko.

Yusuke stared at his floor, negative thoughts skipping happily threw his head, they say: _So why am I here again? Who cares anyways? Life sucks, I want to die. No one is there. I'm alone, I want to die! Die!_

He let the thoughts run, and get stronger as his resistance to listen got weaker. He found everything he did meaningless…

_What is the point anyway? We all die eventually, so why live?_

Kaiko made him food, sat with him, tried talking to him. She even had Kuwabara come over to pick a fight with him. "I'll do you one better Kaiko! I just got a new video game, that I'll know he'll love to beat my ass in… well if he can." He gave a little smirk.

"That'll be great, but I really don't know if Yusuke will play the game."

"Sure he will," Kuwabara went into Yusuke's room and saw him laying down on his bed with his back to his door. "Hey… er… wanna fight?"

"No."

"Fine, then, how about you TRY and beat me at my new game. I doubt you will seeing as I'm the best and you suck," Kuwabara was obviously trying to provoke Yusuke into fighting with him. He tossed the game onto Yusukes bed.

"No thanks."

"No? How can you say no? What is with you Urameshi? You depressed over something or something?" Kuwabara asked, truly wanting to know. Yusuke is his friend, and he has never acted like this before.

"No."

Kuwabara sighed. "Well, ya can't say I didn't try," just then, Kaiko came into the room. Her and Kuwabara exchanged glances both saying "I have no idea what is wrong with him."

Yusuke suddenly sat up, "Why are you two in here?" he asked, sounded slightly agitated. "Get out of my room, and leave me alone."

It really was not like Yusuke to act this way. One minuet he doesn't talk at all, then he'll say something really mean. Without any argue Kaiko and Kuwabara both left his room, and his house for that matter.

The orange haired one walked her home and they talked about their friend all the way. "What do I do Kuwabara? He won't talk to me, and he is depressed. I'm scared for him and worried about him."

Kuwabara told her not to worry. "Come on, this is Yusuke we are talking about here. He is tough, trust me, I know that," and he hit his chest as if to symbolize Yusuke hitting him. "He'll pull out of it, but if you are really worried then why don't you ask Kurama to look at him? Hes smart and stuff."

"Oh good idea Kuwabara. I never thought of that," out of the blue she looked slightly confused. "Um… where does Kurama live?"

Kuwabara laughed a little. "Come on, I'll take you there now if you want." He stopped walked and turned around pointing in the opposite direction.

"Allright, sounds good."

* * *

Yusuke in his room was still laying in his bed. "Whats wrong with me?" he asked himself. "Why do I feel this way?"

His body always felt cold, he always wanted to sleep, he had this constant pain that he never physically felt, but knew was there.

It was like his mind was playing a game with him. Patronizing him and making him feel as if he had done something wrong, but in reality nothing was wrong. It was all him.

He got up out of bed and went into the bathroom. He washed his face and looked into the mirror. He had dark circles under his eyes from not enough sleep and too much all the same. His skin was pale do to lack of sun light in the past month.

Yusuke's whole body ached. He groaned and sat down on his bathroom floor planning not to get up for at least an hour.

The depression talked to him again: _Why don't you just kill yourself? You could die, right now, just do it. There are many ways… just pick one._

"Shut up," he told his head. "I'm tired of being this way!" Yusuke stood up in his bathroom and went back into his bedroom. He sat down on his bed, looked around his dwelling for one last time, and grabbed his shoes.

* * *

"Thanks so much for doing this for me Kurama," said Kaiko who was now walking with Kurama and Kuwabara back to Yusuke's house. She beamed at both of them, knowing that Kurama might be able to snap Yusuke out of his depression.

"It is no problem at all Kaiko, I'm happy I can help," he exclaimed with genuine care. "Do either of you two know why Yusuke is acting depressed?"

"Well no, I haven no idea," Said Kuwabara. "What about you Kaiko.

She thought for a moment or three, "Um, no I don't. It really doesn't make any sense."

"Hum," Kurama was going to a thinking state now. For what meaning could Yusuke not talk, stay in bed all day, not eat, and not sleep? It made no sense to Kurama, Yusuke had always been fairly happy, and when he had not been happy, he usually spoke his mind and let everyone know what was bothering him.

After several long moments of silence they finally reached Yusuke's house. Kurama knocked on the door but no one came to answer so he just left himself in, peaking in his head first. "Yusuke? Are you here? Its Kurama, I'm coming in."

"Of course he is here, he hasn't left his bed in like… three weeks!" said Kuwabara.

Kurama walked into the hall way and stopped at the stairs. "You two, do you think that you could wait here? I want to talk to him for a little bit."

"Sure," both Kaiko and Kuwabara said together.

Kurama moved to start going up the stairs as Kuwabara sat down in Yusukes living room and put on the T.V. "Kuwabara! This is not your house! What are you doing watching their T.V.?"

"Hey, ya never know how long Kurama might take with him so I am just getting com-phey," he said, using emphasis on the phey.

Several short moments later Kurama came running down the stairs in a slight panic. "Yusuke is not here!"

* * *

OMG! YUSUKE IS MISSING? Will he go jump off a cliff? Ya never know. 

five to ten reviews tillt he next chapter, that or until I feel like updating it again.


	2. Chapter 2

DO NOT READ IF DEPRESSED! or do, just don't blame me for anything that you do.

* * *

Several short moments later Kurama came running down the stairs in a slight panic. "Yusuke is not here!"

"Oh my goodness! Where do you think he could have gone?" Kaiko asked full of panic.

Kuwabara said "I'll go check the streets!" as he ran out the door. He always was one to go look in the most obvious places.

"Kaiko you go and call the police and I will go check the school." He hugged her and began to leave.

"Why would he be there? He hates school." She said, Kurama just have her look that said "exactly". She ran to the phone and dialed 911. "Hello?"

"Hello, how may I help you?" said the operator.

Meanwhile Kuwabara ran the streets yelling "Yusuke! Come on man! Where are ya?"

Kurama ran to the school. When he reached it he saw a dark shadow on the top of the school, walking along the edge. "Yusuke!" He yelled and he ran up to the schools doors. Locked. Damn.

He shook the doors as if to get them open. They didn't open.

Kurama ran around to the other doors... All locked! "Yusuke!" Kurama yelled. "I'm here Yusuke!" Looking up, Kurama saw the shadow look down at him.

_Kurama? He cares, see someone cares? _

_No he doesn't, just human nature to care, they can't help it… _

_I should jump._

Kurama wished he was not in his human form other wise he could have jumped up there. Wait… Hiei could jump up there! Now to contact him. How do you contact him!!!!! "Hiei!" Kurama yelled at the top of his voice. He yelled again, and again. "HIEI"

In Kuramas mind there was so many thoughts. Don't jump Yusuke, Hiei will come and he'll help. Your life is fine. Depression will pass… "HIEI!" He yelled again. Kurama most likely would have been able to think of a more sensible way to get up there, but under the possibility and you friend may commit suicide… a mind does not think straight.

After a minuet of yelling Hiei showed up, out of no where of course. "Hiei! Yusuke! He's up there! Stop him from jumping. Please!"

"Why?" Asked Hiei. "If he wants to jump, then let him."

"Hiei please! I can't get up there! He's your friend too! You must be able to feel it! Yusuke is depressed, suicidal…" Exclaimed Kurama.

_Should I do it? I could die, what difference would it make? They'll be sad but they'll get over it… they will. Or they can die too, I don't give a damn. _

Kurama saw the shadow stop pacing along the edge, he saw it thinking, he saw it lean forward contemplating, he saw it slip second guessing and hang on to the edge of the building with fear, he saw it go with sureness, and he saw it fall as if depressed. Kurama felt himself running toward him. "Yusuke!" He yelled, his voice cracking. "Yusuke! Yusuke! NO! YUSUKE!"

* * *

Should he die? Tell me. 


	3. Chapter 3

This is the last chapter everyone. I'm rather tired of this fic, but here it is. Its a little short for he just had to end. Everything does._

* * *

_

_Yusuke eyes fluttered open and saw himself within a white room, lights and peoples faces all around him._ "Yusuke?" Kaiko threw herself upon the young hospitalized boy. She held him and cried, and wept, and was full of sadness and anguish… then anger. She then slapped Yusuke. "Wake up!"

Kurama immediately took hold of Kaiko and held her back from Yusuke. "Kaiko, stop it! You shouldn't hit him in this condition."

_Condition?... What happened?_

_Yusuke sat up in bed and turned around to see himself lying in bed. _

_I'm dead._

Kaiko kept weeping, Kurama held her, Hiei stood in place with eyes closed, and Kuwabara wrapped himself tighter within his jacket. Getting colder.

"Guys, I feel him." said Kuwabara quietly.

Botan walked in, floating on her oar and said something not really to anyone in the room. She had tears in her eyes, and then moved and hugged air. "Yusuke!" She held air for a minuet or two and everyone looked confused.

_Yusuke looked at Kaiko, Kurama, Kuwabara, and Hiei. His mother would miss him, maybe. No, she would. _

"Botan!" A very low, very angry sounding voice called, that only the spirit detectives and Botan heard. "Bring him to me."

"But sir, if I do his body will die."

Kaiko cried more and went to Yusukes body. "Don't go Yusuke, don't go, please."

"_Botan." said Yusuke. "Was I meant to die this time?"_

Botan shook her head no and smiled slightly when she said, "You're unpredictable Yusuke."

Yusuke began to float away from his body. "Botan! Now!"

"Yes sir!"

"NO!" Yelled Kaiko and hugged the body tighter. Kurama once again, prying her away from something she has to let go of.

"I'll miss ya man." Said Kuwabara, waving in the wrong direction.

"I'll let you all know what will happen. Bye." Said Botan and she vanished threw a wall.

Her and Yusuke made their way up to King Yamas place. "I don't understand why we can't see Keonma. Its not like you haven't die before." Silence for a moment. "Why did you kill yourself Yusuke?"

Yusuke had nothing to say. What could he say? He was depressed? Everything seemed pointless? That he could never be happy?

"Yusuke? Answer me."

He still said nothing at all. There was no point in saying anything. She may care, but she wouldn't understand.

They reached Kind Yamas place and strolled inside. "Yusuke, Spirit Detective. You have died and I am giving you a choice. If you like, you can go back to earth, in your own body, with your old life, the way it was, no strings attached. Or you can die. And stay in the spirit world. So Yusuke, do you want to go back to earth?"

Botan was holding her breath. You could come home! Do it! Everyone will be so happy.

_I won't be happy there. I need a new start, a new place, and new home. Or a home. I'm unhappy on earth. I don't want to go back._

It did not take Yusuke long to decide on what path to take. He figured he was meant to die once before, why deny destiny? Not like he could help it anyway.

"So Yusuke, do you want to go back to earth?"

Yusuke answered… "No."

Botan flew back to the hospital to find that Yusukes body had also died. "Hes gone. I'm sorry. He won't be coming back."

Sadness swarmed for days in some, weeks in others, and has yet to leave in the rest.

* * *

Once again, another poorly rushed fic just to get something done. Hurrah. Die Yuske, Die. 


End file.
